It Could Be Worse, I Suppose.
I’ve been wallowing in self-pity a lot this week. The oral hygienist told me I have gingivitis even though I’m one of the ten people on the face of the earth who actually does floss, Addison spilled our sea monkeys all over the ottoman, I got a cold and realized we were out of both TheraFlu and whiskey the day after our medical FSA expired, I picked at what would have been a small unnoticeable zit and made it instead the focal point of my face, my kid learned how to get out of her crib, no one in my family has a job right now except for Ella, who is the line leader this week at school, a position that pays in prestige only, my book proposal got rejected by my agent who won’t even accept my invitation to be my friend on facebook and oh, woe is me, the last two years of my life have all been for not and I shall never ever ever write again, nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I guess I’ll go eat worms…. And then I saw House last night, and a woman got her period out her face. That’s right, menstrual fluid was coming out of her ears, eyes, nose and mouth. So now I’m thinking maybe my week hasn’t been so bad after all.
My-mind-wanders-and-so-these-might-be-related Posts
Mother's Day
One Liner (or "No New Americans")
It's a Sign
I feel as if I have to let it be known that my husband left his job on purpose, making it not so much as cause for pity a reason for celebration. I just needed it to make the story work. I’m a cheat.
Only you would out yourself…By the way, you are fabulous and I love ya! MMMUUUUUUAAAAAHHH!!!
Now that’s the spirit!
Gingivitis?!?!? For God’s sake, Rossi, brush your teeth!
Disclaimer
Meghan: please ignore the part about the gingivitis. It’s a lie. But send me a free toothbrush anyway.
Everyone else: no it’s not. I have gingivitis.
Is there a term for someone who comments repeatedly on her own blog? I am new to this stuff so I’m not sure if that’s allowed…
At least you didn’t sell your favorite couch/napping apparatus unexpectedly on craigslist this weekend and the buyer is coming to pick it up today already. Boo.
Yes, the term is shutthehellup. Look it up–it’s there.
Is it the lazy boy blow up bed couch nap thing that you are betraying via Craig’s List? Nooooo, rose print lazy boy blow up bed couch nap thing, no!
You have a book agent? That’s better than most former book sellers who are trying to be authors. You are lovely and smart and a great writer. Keep your head up, buy more whiskey, and do your best to laugh.
“…And then I saw House last night, and a woman got her period out her face….” EEEEWWWWWWW!
GIngivitus? I have a suggestion. I found a substance that is pretty effective in stopping bleeding of the gums. It is Grapefruit seed extract. I get mine from here. A couple of drops on the toothbrush and within a day, or less, no more bleeding.