Just Barely » Ewww. http://www.justbarely.net It'll crack your shit up. Mon, 12 Jul 2010 19:24:29 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Dead Stuff From the Sea http://www.justbarely.net/2010/04/dead-stuff-from-the-sea/ http://www.justbarely.net/2010/04/dead-stuff-from-the-sea/#comments Tue, 20 Apr 2010 14:17:53 +0000 Amy http://www.justbarely.net/?p=1899 We just got back from staying with my grandparents for a couple of days in Florida, where Ella spent her vacation collecting shells.  Lovely shells of all shapes, sizes and colors.

Addison spent hers collecting dead things from the sea.  And she couldn’t have been prouder of each dead, rotting treasure she pulled from… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2010/04/dead-stuff-from-the-sea/feed/ 7 Stand-Off http://www.justbarely.net/2009/09/stand-off/ http://www.justbarely.net/2009/09/stand-off/#comments Fri, 11 Sep 2009 16:08:46 +0000 Amy http://www.justbarely.net/?p=1134 Something horrible happened to the toothpaste about three months ago–Or, I should say, something horrible started happening to the toothpaste about three months ago.  It started with an explosion of some sort, or perhaps a stabbing.  Toothpaste is all over the bathroom drawer, making a sticky, minty coating on everything else in it.  Prescription drugs,… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2009/09/stand-off/feed/ 12 I think I just found a troll penis in my refrigerator http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/i-think-i-just-found-a-troll-penis-in-my-refrigerator/ http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/i-think-i-just-found-a-troll-penis-in-my-refrigerator/#comments Thu, 25 Jun 2009 19:45:33 +0000 Amy http://www.justbarely.net/?p=988 For reals.  It started out with me throwing out the four flat bottles of tonic in the fridge to make room for the new bottle I opened to carbonate my gin, but then I was on a roll and started tossing other useless food stuffs.  Scrambled eggs from last week, gone.  Prime rib that was… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/i-think-i-just-found-a-troll-penis-in-my-refrigerator/feed/ 9 Balls on the Table http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/balls-on-the-table/ http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/balls-on-the-table/#comments Tue, 16 Jun 2009 01:25:40 +0000 Amy http://www.justbarely.net/?p=963 Seriously people, is there anything more disturbingly fascinating than balls?  The thing that I find the most interesting about balls is what some guys choose to do with them.  Take, for instance, my friend Fake Name.  Fake Name used to use his balls to signal when he was done with something.  If he was out… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2009/06/balls-on-the-table/feed/ 35 A Pack of Wild Animals http://www.justbarely.net/2008/09/a-pack-of-wild-animals/ http://www.justbarely.net/2008/09/a-pack-of-wild-animals/#comments Fri, 12 Sep 2008 18:55:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=97 I have a cat who used to mark his territory by peeing on things. In college he liked my roommate the best, so he peed on her quilt. While we were on our honeymoon he peed on Steve and my wedding gifts. Once I was writing a paper on the many revisions F. Scott Fitzgerald… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2008/09/a-pack-of-wild-animals/feed/ 4 Lend Me Your Ear http://www.justbarely.net/2007/08/lend-me-your-ear/ http://www.justbarely.net/2007/08/lend-me-your-ear/#comments Wed, 15 Aug 2007 19:39:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=42 My baby just spit up. In my ear. I was trying to spend some rare quiet time with her and was holding her over my shoulder and rocking her when she leaned back just enough to get the right angle and regurgitated her lunch in my ear. It then ran down my neck and… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2007/08/lend-me-your-ear/feed/ 0 Parting Gift http://www.justbarely.net/2007/05/parting-gift/ http://www.justbarely.net/2007/05/parting-gift/#comments Tue, 08 May 2007 14:46:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=22 Parting Gift

Yesterday we went to visit my uncle in hospice. I flew in with the girls a couple of days ago so I could spend some time with him before it was time to say goodbye. We had a nice afternoon watching the kids play, telling stories, and reminiscing about days gone by. The… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2007/05/parting-gift/feed/ 3 Top 10 Gross Things My Baby Did Today: http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/top-10-gross-things-my-baby-did-today/ http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/top-10-gross-things-my-baby-did-today/#comments Wed, 18 Apr 2007 18:20:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=20 Top 10 Gross Things My Baby Did Today, all having to do with bodily functions:

10. Spit up while nursing, then kept nursing.

9. Peed while I was changing her, then rolled around in it before I could get a new
diaper on her.

8. Pooped through her diaper…

7. …through her onesie…… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/top-10-gross-things-my-baby-did-today/feed/ 3 Milestone http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/milestone/ http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/milestone/#comments Wed, 11 Apr 2007 18:03:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=19 Most babies start rolling from their front to their back at around 3 months, and from their back to their front around 5 months. When my baby rolled from her front to her back at 2 1/2 months, I was impressed. When she went the other way at 3 months, I equated her early physical… [keep reading]

]]> http://www.justbarely.net/2007/04/milestone/feed/ 1 Seriously, Could This Day Get Any Crappier? Part III of the Epic Series: A Really Crappy Day http://www.justbarely.net/2007/03/seriously-could-this-day-get-any-crappier-part-iii-of-the-epic-series-a-really-crappy-day/ http://www.justbarely.net/2007/03/seriously-could-this-day-get-any-crappier-part-iii-of-the-epic-series-a-really-crappy-day/#comments Mon, 26 Mar 2007 13:16:00 +0000 Amy http://justbarely.net/?p=16 (Be sure to read “A Really Crappy Day: Parts I and II” first)

When I heard a stool being dragged across the bathroom floor and the faucet being turned on, I assumed that, after sufficiently studying the poop in the toilet, Ella had decided to wash her hands. Because my back was to the… [keep reading]

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